Drug Test Administrator
There are plenty of reasons to not want to be a drug test administrator. The pay isn't that great, the work isn't particularly exciting, etc. But I think we all know the real reason to avoid this profession.
There aren't many jobs where you have to spend your days handling strangers' pee, but drug test administrators are all too familiar with it. And if that didn't sound fun enough, there are always the times when someone requires a "direct observation"--meaning you get to be right there in the bathroom with them for the main event.
The circle of life is a beautiful thing, but only at a distance. Just ask animal breeders.
Farm life in general can be difficult and little bit gross, but nothing compares to the ick factor of trying to get a horse or a cow "in the mood." But such is the lot of a livestock breeder. We'll spare you the worst of the details, but let's just say it involves something resembling a turkey baster and a reeeeeally long glove.
Helping a hoarder get their home in order can be a challenge. There are often personal or psychological issues that make getting the job done a challenge, but the worst part of trying to clean up a hoard is the hoard itself.
If you're lucky, the house you're trying to clean will just be full of useless junk. But for the unlucky hoarding specialist, you have rotting garbage, human waste, and a pet skeleton or two to look forward too. If the horrifying visuals don't get you, the horrifying smell will!
Beauty is suffering, which apparently explains why people are willing to have their hair painfully ripped from its follicles. But the suffering of the body waxer is much different than the suffering of the waxee...
Not only are waxers forced into close contact with strangers and their nether regions, they're also seeing these private parts at their most...unkempt. We can't imagine what that's like, but needless to say, it's not pretty.
If you're a budding serial killer, working in a slaughterhouse might sound like a dream come true. For everyone else, it's a pretty gross, thankless job.
Slaughterhouse workers get an up-close and personal view of how the sausage is made (literally), which obviously means plenty of blood and carcasses to go around. With as gross as this job is, you should be thankful someone else is doing it for you.
Proctologists are important--there's no denying that. Diagnosing and treating colon problems is vital work and has saved many lives. That being said, there's also no denying the gross reality that a proctologist is basically a "butt doctor."
At its healthiest, the human anus is still a horror show. When you couple that with the fact that most people visit the proctologist when it's less than healthy, it's not hard to see why proctology can get real gross real fast.
Is there anything grosser than having to use a port-a-potty? Not much, except having to clean a port-a-potty.
We all know what goes in a toilet, and that's gross enough as it is. But port-a-potties make things even more complicated. They're outdoors in the hot sun, which basically turns the toilet into an EZ-Bake Oven powered by Mother Nature. On top of that, not everyone that uses one is as conscientious and clean in the bathroom as you might be. Needless to say, we should show more love for port-a-potty cleaners.
Fecal Transplant Doctor
This is a new area of medicine that has the potential to revolutionize how we treat some diseases. But if "fecal transplant" didn't tip you off, this is for sure a disgusting job.
As the name implies, feces are transferred from a healthy person to the patient, in the hopes that the transfer will help promote good gut bacteria. Regardless, this procedure will 100% promote feelings of disgust for the person who has to administer this transfer.
If the thought of a dead body terrifies, you probably don't want a job that not only requires you to see them but also drain them of blood and play dress up with them.
Morticians do important work for grieving families, but that doesn't make the work any less gross. The mortician's table at career day is definitley not getting much traffic.
Crime Scene Cleaner
Anyone who has to do anything at a crime scene has a tough job. Crime scene cleaners, however, definitely lay claim to having the grossest job out of the bunch.
If seeing blood and gore is bad, just imagine having to clean it up--not to mention any of the other disgusting fluids that may or may not show up too. But hey, cleaning a wine stain out of the carpet doesn't seem so bad once you've spent all day cleaning up blood stains.
Septic Tank Repairman
Septic tanks are gross enough when things are running smoothly. When something breaks down, it reaches a whole new level of disgusting.
If you've ever wanted to poke (or possibly swim) around in a stranger's waste, then septic tank repairman might be the job for you. Otherwise, it's time to hit the classifieds again.
Urology migh be a little less gross than proctology, but not by much.
There are plenty of strange things that come out of humans from time to time, and urologists have to deal with one of the most disgusting ones. And if urine wasn't a big enough draw for you, don't worry--there will probably be a fair amount of blood, too.
Garbage collecting is the iconic gross job. Someone's got to do it, and we're immensely grateful it's not us.
You get to experience a real hodgepodge of disgusting when you work on a garbage truck. A little rotten food, a touch of human waste, and a biohazard or two make this job a Russian roulette of gross.
They bring you new towels and sheets, and they politely ignore the fact that you live like a pig. No one else could do it but hotel maids.
You rarely see them, but believe me--they definitely see you and what a mess you left your room in. Between the dirty clothes, garbage, and, yes, the bodily fluids, hotel maids have one of the grossest jobs around.
Nurses of all kinds have a demanding job, but hosptial nurses are most likely to encounter a real variety of gross.
Especially in the ER, you never know what problem people are going to walk through the door with, but you can be pretty certain it's going to be gross. And nurses are at the front lines dealing with some of the most disgusting aspects of the human anatomy.
Cleaning up after anyone can be disgusting, but when you throw children into the mix, the gross factors rises to absurd heights.
Whether they're dealing with a fresh pile of vomit or middle school boys who need to work on their aim in the bathroom, the life of a school janitor is filled with all sorts of disgusting surprises. Kids don't appreciate the work it takes to keep a school clean, but more importantly, they don't appreciate how gross they themselves truly are.
We had no idea that diving into liquid garbage was a thing, but it most definitely is--just ask a hazmat diver.
If they're lucky, hazmat divers will only have to deal with the dangerous, not the disgusting--like nuclear waste. For the unlucky, they'll spend a lot of time diving in sewers, which has all the danger with the added benefit of grossness as well!
We've done our best to refrain from teasing the people who take gross jobs--everyone's got to make a living, after all. But we draw the line at podiatry--you have to make a lot of gross, conscientious decisions to arrive at this career path.
Why one would want to spend their days in the company of feet (diseased feet, no less!), is beyond us. Maybe some people get a sense of satisfaction from digging out the guts of a plantar wart, but from the outside looking in, this is simply a disgusting job.
Ignoring the disgusting (and sometimes terrifying) sounds that come out of a bathroom stall is a skill that every mature adult has to hone. It's just common courtesy. But now imagine that you hear those noises day in and day out because it's part of your job.
Bathroom attendants have to deal with all the disgusting sights, smells, and sounds that emanate from the guests that enter. Normally you only see these workers at swanky, upscale restaurants and the like, but let me fill you in on a little secret--the rich know how to tear up a toilet just as well as the needy. Pooping is the great equalizer, and bathroom attendants have to deal with it all, no matter what tax bracket it falls in.